Try Couples Counseling, You Could Save Your Relationship

My boyfriend and I were having enough trouble prior to our engagement that we knew we wouldn’t marry if we didn’t get some couples counseling. I know he hated the idea, but I felt it was important, this resistance also strained our relationship.

This is normal by the way, for a person to not want to go for counsel and I’ll tell you why. The resistance is because the person knows they have to talk about very private issues and that is hard. This is a cause for concern when you need someone outside of your close union to intervene.

You might think to yourself, that this is ridiculous, I don’t need help with anything, we can work this out on our own. Well, it is my bet that if you are reading this article, then you need some outside help with your relationship.

It doesn’t mean weakness if you decide to go to a couples counselor. Rather, it should make you feel stronger, since you have the guts to face the issues head on and go through some possibly difficult sessions in order to make things better in your lives. Every one in this life has these painful times.

I am an extrovert and have around 400 people in my world that I can say I know and am more than just an acquaintance with. Including relatives and church people, and there is not one couple not struggling at this moment with something or have some issue that they needed to resolve. People who have Jesus are just as vulnerable as anyone with the same issues.

They might seem to have a handle on everything, but generally, if they are real, they are just walking by faith, believing that God will help them work everything out. If you are having difficulties with your relationship, get with a couple’s counselor and seek good sound advice.

My feeling is that a person who believes in the Bible will be a great help in your relationship since there is a greater understanding in them about God’s word on relationships staying in tact and not divorcing or dividing. If they are following the word of God, they will be inclined to work with you to the enth degree to bring beauty from the ashes.

If you are not a Christian person, then you will still benefit from a church counselor. If you feel compelled to resist that type of couples counseling; then you might want to ask yourself why. If you come up with no truly good reason, then go. But in an effort to do something, please, take the advice of someone who knows, and go to someone, the phone book is full of good counselors who are qualified to help you and your mate. Pick up the telephone today and get started on the road to reconciliation, you will be glad you did.

Learn more about how to save your marriage and prevent a divorce today! Click on this link today: Marriage Problems or have a look at: Couples Counseling and discover how to get your spouse back for good!

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Marriage And Counseling, The Basics Of Counseling

Almost half of all marriages end in divorce. That is why there is an increase in couples seeking marriage counseling. Nobody wants to think that the marriage they are in will end. Marriage counseling offers a way for couples to work thorough problems with an outside influence. Marriage counseling can help couples to rebuild a marriage that was on the way to divorce.

Marriage counseling is a type of therapy that helps married couples resolve problems they may be having in their marriage. Most often counseling is conducted with both partners present. However, sometimes there will be individual sessions depending on the couples needs. The basis for marriage counseling is research that has shown problems in a marriage are best solved through communication and working together. Marriage counseling usually lasts a short period of time, until the problems are resolved and the marriage is back on track and the couple can handle problems on their own. In a session the counselor will ask questions, listen and analyze problems. The counseling usually starts with an analysis of the marriage and its problems. Then the problems are worked through to an amicable conclusion.

Marriage counselors are trained in psychotherapy. They also have an understanding about families, how to understand client’s needs and problems. They also have training that allows them to help clients work through the problems to reach conclusions. All of this training lets them be able to identify underlying problems. A good marriage counselor will not make a client feel guilty or blame. They will teach clients to work through problems and get over bad feelings.

Marriage counseling can help couples open the lines of communication. Communication has been shown to be the key to a healthy and happy relationship. Couples with problems seek marriage counseling to get a better understanding of what has gone wrong in their marriage, so they can once again have a strong marriage.

Marriage And Counseling, Does It Work?

When considering marriage counseling, it’s difficult not to wonder whether seeing a marriage counselor will actually work. This article provides some objective information based on data obtained from a national survey of marriage and family counselors and their clients. Also presented are several interesting opinions provided by individuals who have actually been through marriage counseling and were asked to comment on whether or not seeing a marriage counselor proved effective in helping their relationship.

An honest marriage counselor would agree that the motivation of a couple may be the single most important factor in determining the success of marriage counseling. It’s unlikely that even a brilliant counselor would be able to save a marriage where one spouse has already decided upon a divorce, and a mediocre marriage counselor can probably help a couple who are utterly committed towards making their marriage work. With this in mind, research has been made in an effort to determine, on a more scientific level, the effectiveness of couples counseling.

In an article published by Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, clients of marriage and family counselors from 15 different states reported on their experience with counseling. The findings indicated that marriage and family counselors treated a wide range of issues in relatively short-term fashion, couple and family therapy are briefer than individual therapy, and that client satisfaction and functional improvement are quite high.

[*] Specifically, of clients from 526 marriage and family counselors in 15 different states:

98.1% rated services good or excellent
97.1% got the kind of help they desired
91.2% were satisfied with the amount of help they received
93% said they were helped in dealing more effectively with problems
94.3% would return to the same therapist in the future
96.9% would recommend their therapist to a friend
97.4% were generally satisfied with the service they received
63.4% reported improved physical health
54.8% reported improvement in functioning at work
73.7% indicated improvement in children’s behavior
58.7% showed improvement in children’s school performance
[*] Excerpted from “Clinical Practice Patterns of Marriage and Family Therapists: A National Survey of Therapists and Their Clients”, Journal of Marital and Family Therapy–Volume 22, No. 1

While the above study provides raw data that supports the effectiveness of marriage and counseling, a very interesting discussion on the question “Does Couples Counseling Work” from a public forum devoted to this topic offers a less clinical, but still positive view. Based on what seems to be a very honest and frank discussion among couples “who’ve been there,” the answer to the question of whether or not marriage counseling is effective is a positive one. Read these posts on the Berkley Parents Network.

Regardless of the studies and opinions which seem to support the effectiveness of marriage / couples counseling, there are those who question it’s effectiveness. An article on the about.com portal, had this to say:

The science of marital counseling is being studied in great detail these days. Research is showing that it is not as effective as people think, that women seem to get more from it than men, and that it might not have a lasting effect on the couple’s marriage.

What type of couple gets the most from couple therapy? The answer is young, non-sexist, still in love, open couples.

Which couples receive the least from therapy? Some factors that can make couple therapy unsuccessful include couples who wait too long before seeking help, and often one or the other is set on getting a divorce and is closed to any suggestions that may save the marriage.

Excerpted from the marriage.about.com portal

Unfortunately, the data supporting the above-mentioned research is not specifically cited in the article. The article seems to imply that couples who seek counseling because they want their relationship to work are more likely to succeed with marriage counseling than are those who enter into counseling with the (perhaps hidden) truth that they already want out.

For more marriage and counseling information that couldsave your marriage and get your relationship back on track, click here.